Choosing to Choose
Part of my coping with my broken shoulder bone, immobilized in a sling, is discerning what I can no longer do for myself, at least for another month, what I still can do, what I can ask for-allow others to do for me.
My daily, mini-excursion into the serenity prayer:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and wisdom to know the difference.
A recent example: my left hand-arm-shoulder cannot tolerate any weight or pressure for now, so I can’t hold an envelope in my left hand to open it with my right. I could save up the mail and ask a neighbor, but I “invented” that I could put the envelope on a chair, place my left foot on the envelope to hold it in place, and then open it with my right hand.
The little hit of dopamine, the immediate sense of mastery: I did it!” was so gratifying. This led to further knowing – that choosing to try something and learning that it could work led to the deeper knowing – I can choose, invent, master, and that led to claiming – yes, I can be resilient.
It’s that learning, again and again, I can learn to be resilient, that I’ll be exploring in a new online course in January 2021 on cultivating a resilience mindset.
For now, I’ve “invented” the acronym CLICK – Choose to Learn, Invent, Celebrate, and Know…to know and claim this one small choosing to learn is how we build and claim our resilience over time.
1. Choose one small challenging task to practice with.
2. Learn by thinking outside of the box (like coming up with 100 ways to use a brick)
3. Invent this is the experiment phase, like figuring out how to open a box or package; you just go at it step by step until something works.
4. Celebrate notice the aha! Or wow! That helps store the positivity of the experience in your neural circuitry.
5. Know that what you’ve achieved in this small experiment is part of the larger trajectory of choosing to learn that you can learn, including learning to learn to be resilient.