Resilience for Right Now…and for the Long Haul

Resilience for Right Now…and for the Long Haul

Linda Graham

Resilience – capacities to cope with any distress and bounce back from any adversity – whether the shutdown of the coronavirus pandemic, an immediate threat to health or security, the long-term impact of racial injustice and social inequity – is foundational to our survival and our well-being.

Here are suggestions for immediate resources to strengthen your coping skills and strategies, and to deepen your trust that you can cope with anything, anything at all.

Some suggestions are very practical and immediate, some more for the long haul. There are many additional tools and exercises, audio recordings and video interviews freely available elsewhere on www.lindagraham-mft.net.  And links below to others’ resources as well, an abundance of support.  Dive in and thrive.

For right now:

When Solid Ground Turns to Quicksand

Years ago, I jumped out of a rowboat in shallow water into what I thought would be solid ground. Instead I unknowingly jumped into quicksand, and the pull of the muck, pulling me down deeper into the water, with no firm solid ground to push off from, was instantly and completely terrifying…

September 29, 202

We Don’t Know What We Don’t Know…We Don’t Even Know That We Don’t Know

We’re in a time of re-awakening – again – to the struggles and contributions of people whose history we don’t know, never knew, knew and have forgotten or denied. it’s humbling to realize how much we don’t know, how much we don’t know THAT we don’t know.

September 23, 2020

Anchors Rather Than Answers

No one knows for sure when this pandemic will be over. Anchors are what keep people from drifting into malaise or despair when the normal markers of a life have gone missing.

September 8, 2020

Trees – The Iconic Metaphors for Resilience

Grass pushing up through concrete has always been such a powerful, universal symbol of resilience. Trees manifest that same spirit of life surviving and thriving under the most difficult of circumstances.

September 3, 2020

When You Find You’re Weary…

Most everyone is getting a bit weary these days. And poets still offer their lessons, from all of these struggles, in endurance, perseverance, determination, grit.

August 27, 2020

One Petunia, One Voice, One Huge Redemptive Truth

Some days, when I get overwhelmed, I focus on just one petunia blooming in my garden. Not the whole garden. One petunia, blooming its heart out, manifesting the miraculous life force of all the petunias in the world.

July 13, 2020

For a little more depth and breadth:

Flattened by the News of the World…Revived by the Wonder of the Natural World

Everyone in this world is struggling right now to keep their head above water, searching for solid ground in the chaos and hope despite the news of new challenges, new catastrophes every day. We can find renewed buoyancy in wonder and reverence for the beauty (and fierceness) of the natural world.

October 9, 2020

Coping with What We're Instinctively 
Afraid Of

It’s important to me to learn more about the Instinctive “othering” that our brains are hard-wired by evolution to do, and learn to train my brain to overcome that “othering” when I’m encountering my fellow human beings.

October 7, 2020

The Crisis of the Moment Grabs Our Attention – We Lose the Big Picture

Our attention focuses sharply when we sense imminent danger. When the danger eases, our attention eases, too, returning to what is more normal without even noticing the shift.

October 1, 2020

My Grandmother’s Hands

The New York Times best-seller My Grandmother’s Hands: Racialized Trauma and the Mending of Our Hearts and Bodies is one of the best books on trauma ever, especially about the multi-generational transmission of trauma.

August 24, 2020

I’m Hiding, Please See Me; Unmasking Shame

Excerpts and exercises from Dr. Nikki Rollo’s excellent article on healing shame.

August 17, 2020

Racism Is Terrible. Blackness Is Not

A deft and delicate balance of truths – scathing and uplifting at the same time – in the September 2020 Atlantic by Imani Perry, professor of African American Studies at Princeton University. 

August 10, 2020

We Make a Decision…and Then They Change the Rules

A common lament these days…

July 27, 2020

Let This Young Black Woman’s Voice Be the One You Listen to Today

Christabel Nunoo gives voice to the truth of the pain and anger of young black men and women today.

June 24, 2020

The Whole Debacle in Less than 15 Seconds

Relating resiliently to just one person at a time can be hard; negotiating relationships between groups of people can be even harder.

June 22, 2020

Resilience 2.0: Compassion, Clarity, and Courage…

Resilience is foundational to shifting our responses to danger and life threat, to changing our world when the very fabric of that world is threatened.


The Hard Issues the Pandemic Is Back Burnering

The coronavirus pandemic has back-burnered many other social-political-health issues for the time being, perhaps rightfully so, but sadly so.

May 26, 2020

ABC’s of Working with Difficult Emotions

Just daily living evokes many emotions throughout the day anyway, and especially in a time of great disruption and change like the current pandemic, we experience some emotion or another every single moment of the day. 

May 15, 2020

Free Guided Practices

Creating a Coherent Narrative

Sometimes we do have to cope with serious sorrows and struggles that break our hearts and sometimes break our spirits. And…whatever happened has its place in your life, but it doesn’t have to determine the rest of your life.

September 28, 2020

Seeing the Goodness That Others 
See In You

These days when we get flummoxed or weary or discouraged, we can lose track of our own strengths, our base of resilience, our own goodness. Claiming this inner goodness, through self-awareness, self-acceptance, self-appreciation, is key to recovering your resilience.

September 21, 2020

Identifying Traits /Symbols of Resilience

We all need to know what traits of resilience we already have and to claim ourselves as resilient when we exhibit those traits.  This double-awareness strengthens our resilience and nourishes our sense of self as someone who is and can be resilient.

September 14, 2020

Quick Links to other experts' excellent offerings:

Sleep Your Way to Health…
and Better Coping

Excellent tips for the good night’s sleep we need to face the details, let alone the difficulties, of daily living and coping.

October 8, 2020

Now More than Ever…Inspiration from the Arts

Music and dance have explored and expressed every facet of human life – deep joys, sorrows, struggles and triumphs – ever since there has been human life on this planet. Not a luxury, but rich re-Sourcing in the most challenging as well as the most ebullient of times.


Greater Good Science Center 

Resilience and Coping


For the deeper, broader perspective:


Strengthening Resilience in these Challenging Times of the Pandemic, Racial Injustice, and Social Inequity

Sponsored Marin CAMFT (California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists)

September 19, 2020

Full one hour forty minute webinar
(live Q&A edited out for confidentiality and privacy requirements)

Section 1 – 25 minutes
Marin CAMFT introduction and Processes of Resilience

Section 2 – 25 minutes
Tools to address the impact of the coronavirus pandemic and to cultivate a resilience mindset for the long haul

Section 3 – 40 minutes
The realities of long-standing racial injustice, social/economic inequity, the inter-sectionality of all forms of “othering” and oppression; tools to take responsibility for us v. them and shame-blame

Section 4 – 7 minutes
Moving beyond resilience for the personal self to resilience in the fabric of the larger society

Virtual Lunch Together: Linda Graham and Michael Kerman

Leading Edge Seminars, Toronto, Canada

One-hour video interview, April 1, 2020

Online Course

Resilience 2.0

Especially in times of rapid change and uncertainty, we need to learn the strategies and deepen the underlying practices that allow us to cope with any disappointment, any difficulty, and any disaster. And to learn that we can.


Resilience – to Cope with Anything, Anything at All

Veteran’s PATH

One-hour video podcast with Jon Macaskill, Navy SEAL commander turned mindfulness teacher, director of Veteran’s PATH

May 14, 2020

Bouncing Back Like a Skilled Ninja

Full Pre-Frontal: Exploring the Mysteries of Executive Function

One-hour interview Linda Graham with Sucheta Kamath, CEO of Cerebral Matters, 

April 10, 2020

Resilience in Turbulent Times

One hour interview Linda Graham with Michelle Chalfant, 

March 20, 2020

Video Interviews

Jonah Paquette, PhD

Remembering What Really Matters Strengthens Our Resilience

Christine Carter, PhD

The Need for Resilience Is Not a Surprise: Make Your “If/Then” Plans

Ron Siegal, PhD

Why Some People Bounce Back Quickly, Even Heroically

Elisha Goldstein, PhD

Resilience Is a Verb

Tara Brach, PhD

Loving Awareness in the Present Moment Is Foundational to Our Resilience

Christopher Germer, PhD

The Yin-Yang of Mindful Self-Compassion

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